Gift Registry

Registering a gift list serves two important goals: it allows you to get some nice, new things and it allows your guests to show an appreciation of their love and friendship. If you decide you do not want a gift list, still be prepared to receive gifts as people will want to give some token.

If you feel that you have everything you will ever need, there are plenty of alternatives. Remember that although you can register with the major department stores in advance and may have chosen your gifts sometime in advance, the list might not open until a few weeks before the big day. Also, you may have to add appropriate gifts should the list be popular!

Some tips:

• Research a few different shops which do gift registry: find out how you do it (e.g. scanner, piece of paper), when you can do it and when will they deliver. Your aim is to have a range of gifts to suit all tastes and budgets so choosing the right supplier is vital

• Choose your supplier; you can have a gift list at more than one emporium, but we would recommend no more than two

• If you have all the items you have why not register for vouchers (most department stores will automatically put this as an option on your wedding list anyway) but you could have a voucher list at a travel agent or a specialised shop. You can also just ask for specific type of vouchers e.g. DIY, but specify the store so you don't get different ones

• Take into account where your list is geographically e.g. not everyone can make it to Harrods in London. So try and pick a supplier that will either take orders over the phone or at least the internet

• Remember it is rude to ask for money; if this is what you really want do not put it in your invitation but put the word around using your close friends and family. Generally, people do not like giving money as they fear it is impersonal and that any amount will not look enough. Our advice is not to do it!

• The only time it is polite to give money is when it follows the tradition of the couple. For example, in some cultures it is the done thing to pin money on the bride. If you think this will be the case for a wedding you are attending, don't be afraid to ask the couple about protocol

• It is increasingly popular for couples to ask for money for their honeymoon. Some travel companies and travel agents now do this. Details can be mentioned, as you would for your gift list, in the information you send out with your invites. As with all travel companies, make sure they are covered by the suitable insurance such as ATOL, ABTA and IATA

• Most people spend between £25 and £70 on a present and close family and friends may want to spend more, therefore make sure you have a range of gifts on your list from small things from a few pounds (think kitchen utensils) to larger items like lamps and electrical equipment

• Remember that presents normally will be delivered after you return from honeymoon so do not bank on an item you want for the honeymoon being made immediately available

• People will bring presents on the day. Arrange an attendant to have responsibility for organising with the venue the safe storage of these presents and for someone to take them away the next day (remember you are off on your honeymoon!)

• A pretty covered box with a sign on it can be placed where guests can see it for cards to be deposited on the day which will save them getting lost (especially if they hold money!)

• When opening presents be very careful to take a note of who sent what as you will cause great offence if you thank the wrong person for a present!

• If you have a present and you do not know who sent it, discreetly ask around

• If you have a card from a present detached from the present itself and cannot match it up with the pile of presents that surround you, you can always send an ambiguous thank you note, "Thank you very much for your kind and generous gift. It was lovely to see you on the day and we hope you enjoyed it as much as we did"

• Do not delay too long after receiving your gifts to sending thank yous. Mainly because you will forget who sent what (especially if you have not taken our advice and written it down). Preferably within two weeks of receiving the gift. Also because it will seem like a chore - strike when you are still in the wedding "zone"!

• If something has arrived broken or damaged, get in touch with the supplier sooner rather than later and they will organise a replacement

• You will get a totally unexpected gift and people will surprise you with their generosity. You may get a hideous gift but even these are usually sent with love so be generous when discussing afterwards!