Etiquette starts from the outset of planning your wedding. The first thing that must be got right is the invitations (see our Invitation page). It is also important that on the day proper etiquette is followed at the ceremony and reception. Here are some guidelines as what to do and what not....
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Organise in advance all the necessary transport for the main wedding party for the day: Bride's parents, Groom's parents, Best Man and the Bridesmaids
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Ensure everyone in the main wedding party has a buttonhole; failure to give an important family member a buttonhole will give offence!
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Make sure you have put aside and organised the giving of any money that has to be paid for services on the day (put the money in envelopes and give instructions to the attendant to whom you have entrusted the job)
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Do remember the solemn nature of the service. No jokes at the church! Let the minister make jokes if they want to, but not you.
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Make sure you give proper attention not only to each other but to the main players. Start out on the right foot by being nice to your in-laws regardless of any provocation
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Organise your reception line-up in advance if you are having one. It is a good way of ensuring your and your family get to say hello to each of your guests. The line up can be done as guests enter the reception venue (if everyone in the wedding party is back before the guests) or as people go into the main reception room for their meal
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If you have invited your Minister to the reception, ask them to say Grace or ask someone at the reception perhaps who has a clerical leaning
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Don't drink too much! Nerves can get the better of anyone but a combination of tiredness, excitement, adrenaline and alcohol can be a heady mix.
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Remember the dos and don'ts of speeches (see our guide to Speeches)
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Do organise gifts (see our Presents page) for the main players during the speeches.
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Do remember to thank people for being there as you meet them throughout the day. They have usually travelled, spent money on their outfits and presents just for you and, whilst they probably don't need to be thanked, it is nice if you can make them feel special by spending a little time speaking to each one
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Make sure you have a note of who has given what present and ensure a timely thank you card on your return from honeymoon
